Hey man I was in the same state as you for a long long while, I still am in a bad mindset but it's getting better. The only thing I can say to you is to just talk to people, weather it be family, friends, relatives or even a councillor. Don't keep it all bottled up because that's the worst possible thing you could do in this type of situation.
Just remember you have all of us on the forums to talk to. We're all here for you!
Hope this helps in some way.
Get well Jesse!