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Author Topic:  A look back, return, developments about me, etc.  (Read 980 times)

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Panther

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A look back, return, developments about me, etc.
« on: July 19, 2021, 06:10:23 AM »
Hello everyone. I hope you're doing swell amidst the world right now. It's been . . weird for me to say the least. If you don't remember me, I'm ThatAnimeKid fka Brian Trollz 17 (haven't said that name in a long time.) Many might remember me to be a young, brash person who was, let's be honest, really annoying at points before my leave. I just wanted to make this almost as a post to reflect and update to what's changed with me because well, it's a bunch.

First off, wow. I've skimmed over some old topics and replies I've sent back around 2016, 2017 and wow, I can't believe you all dealt with that to be honest. From a few years of much needed maturity, I can finally say, thank you for accepting me back then, and thank you for keeping me around, haha.

Secondly, it feels like forever since I talked about my passions or whatever. I can easily say watching professional wrestling never went away, in fact it grew. I now watch a lot of older matches and more, out of the public eye promotions now. (Japanese Deathmatches, Joshi, etc.). I've started to work on higher end editing projects as of late that's a love letter to my affection of wrestling. Oh, and my love for hockey never went away.

Next, I wanted to talk about me. Since basically leaving, I took a lot of time to look at myself and ask if this was who I wanted to be. I wasn't really.. happy being who I was, physically, mentally, emotionally and literally. As of March of 2019, I decided to come out as both Gender-neutral and Pansexual. Coming out and being someone that I thought was better, and figuring it all out made me happy. I'd suffered from a lot of PTSD, depression and anxiety due to events with being who I was, and felt like that made it all better. There was a lot of moments in late 2018 where it was really tough for me. I was battling the thought of going over the edge, thinking all the the events that happened years ago was my doing and fault and I'd be better off in some ditch not.. well.. alive. After many, many foolish attempts, I decided to finally seek help. This led me down the path I am proud I took. I'm proud to say that I am who I want to be. I don't suffer from a lot of the hypothetical fears that I felt plagued me anymore and I'm truly, truly at peace with myself now after seeing some therapists and figuring out my life, myself and my mental. I go by Em now, by the way. :)

I also wanted to mention some smaller things. My Xbox gamertag is still the same, however, I moved over to a new account due to a bug that happened a while ago with one of the games I was playing. I also go under the same name on Steam which is KiwiFTP. I'm also in the discord from years ago when I still had access to that account, which I did get back. I've barely kept any tabs on TM's development but I'm glad to see many people I remember, along with the many same development members still around here. With the release on PC, and being able to, well, be on PC freely now, I think I have to relive a few of my younger years. I could sit here for days boring everyone over some memories I had playing but ? Maybe another time.

I hope everyone is having a great day, and a even better life ! Just remember, if you need someone, my messages are always (legitimately now) open for you ! I love you all so much, thank you for all up to this point.

Jesse

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Re: A look back, return, developments about me, etc.
« Reply #1 on: July 20, 2021, 02:52:50 PM »
Welcome Back! :)


/mm Thanks GK for Sig /mm
/mm MotM September '14 /mm
/mm Robo February '15 /mm
/mm 4th Demi Gods December '16 /mm
/mm YouTube: SOGMonkey /mm

Panther

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Re: A look back, return, developments about me, etc.
« Reply #2 on: July 21, 2021, 04:17:23 AM »
JESSE ! I MISSED YOU ! ! ! Thank you for the warm welcome back.  :D